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I LIVE A FUCKEN LIE! WELL FIRST OFF IM IN LOVE WITH AN ASSHOLE WHO PROMISED ME HAPPINESS AND BRINGS ME NOTHING BUT MISERY, MY PARENTS ALWAYS MAKE ME FEEL LIKE SHIT AND MY ONLY HAPPINESS IS MY CHILDREN, LET ME START OFF BY SAYING THAT MY KIDS DO HAVE DIFFERENT FATHERS, MY 5 YEAR OLDS FATHER I WAS WITH FOR 5 YEARS AND IT WAS ALL BLISS FOR TWO YEARS BUT IN THE END I ONLY STOOD CAUSE I THOUGHT I WAS STILL IN LOVE WITH HIM, BUT HE TREATED ME LIKE SHIT IN THE END, HE PAID NO ATTENTION TO ME BUT YET ALWAYS WANTED ME BY HIS SIDE AND I NEVER UNDERSTOOD THAT, MAYBE BECAUSE HE LIKE TO FEEL IMPERIAL, I DONT KNOW BUT HE ALWAYS MADE ME CRY AND ALWAYS BROUGHT ME DOWN SO I GOT TIRED OF IT AND LEFT HIM ONLY TO TEACH HIM A LESSON ONLY THING THAT HE DIDNT EVEN CARE, SO I HAD TO SLOWLY GET OVER HIM, AND JUST WHEN HE REALIZED THAT I'D GIVEN UP ON HIM HE WANTED ME BACK, HE CAME TO ME WITH FLOWERS AND EVEN PROPOSED TO ME BUT IT WAS TOO LATE, I JUST COULDNT DO THAT SHIT NO MORE, AS TIME WENT BY I HAD A FEW GUYS THAT WANTED ME TO GIVE THEM A CHANCE BUT I REFUSED, I WAS CONVINCED THAT MEN WERE ALL ASSHOLES AND I DIDNT TAKE A CHANCE WITH ANYONE, EXCEPT FOR ONE OF MY GUY FRIENDS, LIKE I SAID HE WAS MY FRIEND FOR A WHILE AND ONE OF THE ONLY PEOPLE I CONFIDE IN ABOUT MY EX, I MEAN HE KNEW EVERYTHING I WENT THROUGH , HE KNEW ABOUT HOW BAD MY PREGNACY WAS, HE KNEW ABOUT ALL THE VERBAL AND PHYSICAL ABUSE, HE KNEW EVERYTHING , SO I FIGURED WHY NOT GIVE HIM A CHANCE, HE WOULD NEVER PUT ME THROUGH SHIT CONSIDERING HE PROMISED HE WAS NOTHING LIKE MY EX BUT THAT WAS ALL BULLSHIT,AS TIME WENT BY HE CHANGED, HE ENDED UP WORST THEN MY EX, HE BRINGS ME NOTHING BUT MISERY AND PAIN, EVERYTHING WAS SO PERFECT FOR A PERIOD OF TIME BUT HE CHANGED, I BECAME PREGNANT AND THIS PREGNACY WAS EVEN WORST THEN MY FIRST, HE BEAT ME, CALLED ME NAMES, WOULD MAKE ME FOLLOW HIM IN THE STREET WITH NO SHOES ON WHILE CALLING ME NAMES AND TELLING ME" GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU STUPID BITCH BEFORE I BREAK YOUR FUCKEN FACE" IN FRONT OF EVERYONE WHO WOULD BE OUT, NOW I HAVE A BABY THAT IS 4 MONTHS, I LOVE MY KIDS, THEY'RE MY WORLD, BUT IM SO MISERABLE, AS A WRITE THIS I SHED TEARS CAUSE IM SO ALONE, IM STILL WITH THIS GUY, I THINK I LOVE HIM BUT IM NOT SURE WHY IM WITH HIM, I JUST DONT WANNA BE ALONE OR GET LAUGHED AT BY MY EX WHO ONCE TOLD ME THAT THE NEXT GUY I GET WAS GONNA BE WORST THEN HIM, I DONT WANT HIM TO THINK THAT HE WAS RIGHT, THE OTHER DAY ME AND MY BOYFRIEND GOT INTO IT AND I DEFENDED MYSELF WHICH HE HATES AND HE PUNCHED ME RIGHT IN THE HEAD, HE GOT SO SCARED CAUSE I LITERALLY HAD A DENT ON MY FORHEAD, HE RAN DOWNSTAIRS TO GET ME ICE AND WAS REALLY SCARED, I SAT THERE IN PAIN , CRYING CAUSE HE DID THIS WHILE MY SON CRYED IN MY ARMS, MY PARENTS ARE OK WITH HIM ONLY BECAUSE THEY DONT KNOW WHAT HE DOES TO ME, I DONT TELL THEM, ALTHOUGH HE GETS ON THEIR NERVES SOMETIMES I DONT TELL THEM ANYTHING, THEY THINK THAT A GLASS VASE FELL ON MY HEAD AND HAVE NO IDEA WHAT REALLY HAPPENED, HE SAT THERE AND TOLD THEM THAT I GOT HIT IN THE HEAD WITH A GLASS VASE KNOWING THAT HE DID THIS TO ME. NOW IM WALKING AROUND WITH A BIG BLACK AND BLUE BRUISE ON MY HEAD AND I CANT TELL NOBODY MY PAIN EMOTIONALLY,USUALLY WHEN HE HITS ME ITS ON MY BODY AND NOT MY FACE, HE DOESNT WANT PEOPLE TO SEE,HE ONCE SLAMMED HIS CAR TRUNK ON MY ARM, I NEVER WENT TO THE HOSPITAL BUT I THINK HE CAUSED SOME KIND OF DAMAGE CAUSE ITS STILL HURTS AND THAT WAS LIKE LAST YEAR SOMETIME.I CANT TELL MY FRIENDS CAUSE THEY THINK OF ME AS "FUCKEN SHORTY THE BAD ASS THAT TAKES NO SHIT FROM NOBODY, THE ONE THATS QUICK TO SLAP A BITCH FOR ACTING STUPID, THE ONE THAT FINALLY FOUND HAPPINESS AFTER GOIN THROUGH HELL WITH HER EX" IM SO ALONE , I CRY ALL THE TIME, I SMILE ONLY FOR MY KIDS, HE DOESNT WANT ME TO WORK OR GO TO SCHOOL CAUSE HE'S AFRAID I MIGHT LEAVE HIM FOR SOMEONE, ON A GOOD DAY HE CAN BE SOOOO NICE AND ADMIT THAT HE'S WRONG AND DOESNT KNOW WHAT HE'S THINKING WHEN HE DOES THIS TO ME, HE'LL ADMIT THAT I DONT DESERVE THIS, HE KNOWS ABOUT EVERYTHING I WENT THROUGH WITH MY EX SO WHY WOULD HE PROMISE TO DO RIGHT BY ME, WHY WOULD HE PROMISE TO MAKE ME HAPPY AND NEVER HURT ME? I DONT UNDERSTAND. IM SO STUPID I KNOW, I CRY TO HIM AND HE THINK ITS FUNNY, HE LIES TO ME AND HURTS ME EVERY DAY, HE HURTS ME WITH EVERY BREATH HE TAKES, HE'S GOOD WITH THE KIDS BUT THEY SEE THAT SOMETHINGS WRONG WITH MOMMY, MY OLDEST THAT IS 5 ALWAYS TELLS ME, WHATS WRONG MOMMY? WHY DO YOU LOOK SAD? I JUST TELL HER MOMMY'S TIRED THATS ALL BABY. I KNOW IM NOT UGLY BUT IM SO CONVINCED THAT THIS IS ALL ILL EVER GET SO WHY MOVE ON, IM A SHORT LATINA WITH A THICK LIL BODY, SLANTED EYES AND LONG CURLY HAIR, I THINK IM PRETTY, I GET ALOT OF ATTENTION BUT LIKE I SAID ALL MEN ARE ASSHOLES, THERE LIKE PARKING SPOTS, ALL THE GOOD ONES ARE TAKEN AND THE REST ARE HANDICAP. YESTERDAY WE TOOK THE KIDS TRICK OR TREATING AND I SWEAR I TRY TO HAVE A GOOD TIME FOR THE SAKE OF MY KIDS BUT HE MAKES ME SO MISIRABLE, I HATE TO SEE HAPPY PEOPLE , HAPPY COUPLES, IT MAKES ME DEPRESSED THAT I CANT HAVE THAT, IF THERE IS ANYONE THAT CAN RELATE PLEASE GET BACK TO ME, IM NOT LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP CAUSE I DONT BELIEVE IN THEM, I JUST WANT AN OPINION, A REPONSE, IM SO ALONE.
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